Review: Broad Street Mitten Pattern

Someone came to me on Etsy, wanting some convertible mittens in Harry Potter's Gryffindor colors. I've never made anything quite like mittens with a flip cap on them before, so I decided to see what I could make. I found a pattern for the "Broad Street Mitten" and thought it seemed easy enough. Here is my review of what I did.

First, check out the pattern here: http://knitty.com/ISSUEfall02/PATTbroadstreet.html 

Here's what they should look like when finished:

  But mine turned out a little different. Now, granted I modified the pattern a bit to fit my needs, but I followed the dimensions exactly. Here are mine:

They are HUGE! The creator said she had large hands, but geez! My husband can't even wear these. I haven't decided if I'm even going to bother selling these to the nice customer. The cuff fits really well, but it's where the palm widens that it gets all huge. I have no idea why. I used the exact needles and yarn gauge and everything.

To get to down to review basics, these gloves were tedious. When working with size 2 needles, your fingers get sore. The stitching is so tight it's hard to maneuver the needles at all. The pattern itself wasn't so hard to follow, but the last few instructions needed some clarification. I couldn't tell where or why I was supposed to be sewing the ribbed cuff down on the sides of the hand. I was thinking that would sew my gloves shut. I eventually figured out what she meant, though. These gloves took about 12 hours of work, and I don't think I'll be making any more. I'm going to look for another pattern to fit my needs because this one came out massive. Maybe my neighbor's husband can wear them. Hm....

My recommendations: if you're making these for a man, they will work great. If you're a woman, they will swallow your hands up. They will give you eye strain to make, and your fingers will want to bleed. The results look nice enough, but they probably won't fit. This pattern makes good practice to improve your knitting skills, but not much else.

Pumpkin Carving 101

2007

2008

Today, I'm going to give you an idea of how I carve my awesome pumpkins. It's so easy it's almost ridiculous. Where are most people cut open the top of a pumpkin and gut it, I start from the bottom. I cut the bottom out and gut it, which allows me to sit the pumpkin directly over the lit candles without having to try to light them while already inside the pumpkin. This really simplifies things. Each pumpkin I carve takes anywhere from 1 to 4 hours. Freddy Kruger took 4, and I vowed to never do that again. He turned out great, but my back was killing me and my eyes hurt too  much. Hellboy took 2 hours, because it didn't have as much detail but it was freezing outside so I couldn't feel my hands. That really slowed me down. This year I did a True Blood theme. Each one took an hour and a half. Gutting them was much easier, because they were all really slick inside, so everything scraped away fast. I just use the cheap pumpkin carving kits you can buy at all major retailers. They have everything I need, except an Exacto knife, which I already own. The Exacto knife helps with the smaller holes that carving knives just can't make. It also helps smooth out corners. I recommend carving while the sun is up, because it's warmer. That is, if you carve outside like I do. I hate making a mess in my house. Plus, pumpkin sticks to everything. I mean everything. I think I still have some on my hands, and it's been 24 hours. 

2009

This year, I did Bill Compton, Eric Northman and Sookie Stackhouse. I think Bill turned out the best. Sookie isn't bad, but Eric needs some work. Some of his small details aren't showing up. I just don't have the energy to go out there and fix them. By now, though, the carving is already drying out so there's no need to even bother. When you do carvings with fine details, like my Freddy, it will shrivel twice as fast as a normal jackolantern. It was puckered the very next day. Frustrating. But it did win 2 awards, one at my work and one online. That was the year I decided to start carving like that every year. I missed last year because I was in a small apartment and had nowhere to carve or display the work. So what was the point? But this year, living on base, I have all three outside. I just have to watch the neighborhood kids to make sure none of them get cocky and stomp or steal my babies. (They're that mean sometimes, trust me.) 

2011: Eric Northman (needs work.)

2011: Bill Compton (my favorite)

2011: Sookie Stackhouse

 All stencils are courtesy of the awesome folks at www.zombiepumpkins.com. Check them out for even more great stuff!

Vampire Diaries: TV vs Books

Well, where to start? First off, the books have been around for 20 years. So all you that think it's just a rip off of Twilight, you have it backwards. (And you're a Twi-tard, so shut up.) Next, I'd like to say the television show is much better. It has better character development and a better story. In the books, Elena is too spoiled and demanding. It makes her very hard to relate to. In the show, she is much more normal, maybe a little too sad. Damon is the same in the books and T.V. I think they cast him very well. Stefan looks different than in the books, but he carries the same brooding nature. So I'd say he isn't a bad fit. 

Katherine, on the other hand, is just plain crazy in the books. In the show, she's crafty and evil, but the original Katherine was driven mad by a series of circumstances. It made her evil but not the kind of evil that T.V. Katherine is. 

Elena in the book is a blonde, but on T.V. she's a brunette. What's that about? She's supposed to be blonde-headed with blue eyes. It just kind of irritates me. Plus Bonnie is a red-headed Celt witch, originally, but they made her a black witch descended from slaves. I guess to make the show politically correct? I dunno. But I think I like Bonnie in the show better. She isn't a whiny and cowardly. Caroline is basically the same in both book and T.V. form. Very stuck up, selfish and mean. But she seems to get better in the show. Tyler, yeah, a jerk in both forms. Matt, very sweet in both forms. 

The one thing about the show that bothers me is the little things they changed. Like they live in Mystic Falls instead of Fell's Church. Fell's Church is actually a church in the show. And Stefan and Damon are originally from Mystic Falls, but they're supposed to be from 15th century Florence. It makes more sense, since their last names are Salvatore. Which is typical Italian. The fact the Salvatore brothers are only about 160, instead of 500 is weird. It's one of the things that made them what they were. Damon was so strong because he was so old and always fed on humans. Stefan was strong, but not as strong because he didn't feed on humans. Well, at least the show got that part right. 

And how about the way the brothers were turned? Working together and getting shot? No, they actually killed one another out of pure hatred. That's why Damon is always after his little brother. Although I like the dynamic between the two of them, how they love/hate/love each other. And if I were in their world, I can't say I'd be able to resist Damon's smile. It's too charming.

I saw Ian Somerhalder doing the booth at ComicCon once, and even though I know he's not Damon, it's very hard to tell the two apart. I think he plays the part so well, and I'm afraid he'll get typecast. It's happened to nearly every Superman in history. Maybe it won't happen to Damon Salvatore. Paul Wesley manages to get other gigs. I just wonder if it's a crime or a sin to be as gorgeous as both those guys are. They're not the ugly, CG handsome of Edward. (Which I think is hideous.) They are real, touchable handsome. I don't think they look like brothers, but oh well. I can overlook that. They're still cute. I just always thought Damon was taller than Stefan.


Now, before I go, let me give you a quick review of the first 4 books. Elena is a b*tch. Stefan is brooding. Damon is Damon. Stefan and Elena fall in love, Damon hates it. Damon falls in love with Elena, Stefan hates it. Elena ends up with Stefan. He proposes. Elena dies, comes back as a vampire (sneaky Damon giving her blood). They all three end up fighting Katherine, who's off her rocker. Elena dies saving the brothers. The 4th book is the best... because Elena is dead. lol She speaks to them from beyond the grave to help them defeat Klaus, the creator of Katherine. And somehow, Elena comes back to life? WTF? Oh well. I have the 3rd volume, which I need to read and figure out what on Earth is going on. I know some of you already know, but I'm late to the party. I read several book series, so cut me some slack. I live in a freakin' library, if you ever see my home.


Tomorrow, Pumpkin Carving 101. :)

The HCG Breakdown

Now, I'm not a doctor. I'm a patient at a very nice, popular weight loss/pain management clinic in OKC. I've had amazing results from this diet. But HCG isn't for everyone. It's really hard and really easy all at once. 

You start by realizing you need to lose weight. I recommend HCG for those that need to lose 30-75 pounds. Less or more, and you need to consider other options. Less, because it's just too expensive to waste your money on. And for 100+ pounds, you need to do more than just drop some pounds. You need to make serious lifestyle changes.

Then you make an appointment at a HCG clinic. They will walk you through the costs. My clinic does monthly payments, which is nice. Then you'll normally have some bloodwork and an EKG. And then you will learn all about the HCG Protocol.

The Protocol is simple. You are given a vial of prescription HCG (not the drops, which are fake), some clinics give you a handbook and a diet log, too. Mine even gave me vitamins and syringes. Once daily, preferably in the  morning, you will take a shot in the stomach. YES, you have to give it to yourself. YES it has to be in the belly. No, it doesn't hurt. Trust me. I've taken 60 of these injections. If you do it right, you don't even feel it. 

Once you take the shot, then you go about your day. That's it! No exercise required. All you have to do is follow the 500 calorie diet. Now, this is where people really get bent out of shape. "500 calories? That's like nothing!" Well, the HCG curbs your appetite. It makes your stomach shrink, so 500 calories is actually plenty. The hormone allows your body to run on stored fat instead of food intake. You can lose 1-3 pounds a day! The list of allowed foods isn't large, and you have to get creative about it all. NO CARBS! Only certain proteins, veggies and fruits. No pork, no bananas, no diet sodas, no salad dressings. (Unless you refer to my Walden Farms entry earlier.) It might sound hard but it works.

The diet is normally either 23 or 43 days. So this doesn't take long and you get results right away. I lost 5 pants sizes. 

My mother was so proud of me, and was showing my before/after pictures to all her office employees. One lady, a "runner", asked how I did it, and mom said "She did the HCG diet!" The runner woman looked appalled. "That diet is BAD!" But she didn't seem to know why. It's like people that say high-fructose corn syrup is bad but can't exactly explain it. And I have nothing against runners, I used to be one and I am trying to work back into it. But it's so easy to criticize someone's diet when YOU only weigh 88 pounds soaking wet. If you're a twig, DON'T presume to tell me what I should or shouldn't do to lose weight. You're not Richard Simmons. 

Every now and again, I meet someone that will give me grief about this. They will try to dig up something about it being unhealthy. They mostly dig up bad news on the "fake" HCG. Now, let me tell you about the "fake" HCG. The drops. The mouth spray. If you have ever bought these, you might as well have lit money on fire. It's all fake. It's been proven that there is absolutely no HCG in those drops. Some even say "homeopathic". It's impossible to have homeopathic HCG. HCG is the pregnancy hormone. I have recently read that the drops have been pulled off the market or are now having to change their labels to reflect the truth about their contents. In other words, they've been lying and got caught. Real HCG can only be gotten from a doctor. I actually found a website that claimed to sell HCG injections cheap, but that scared me. You have no idea what you're really shooting up.

Long and short of it, I recommend this diet. But I also warn people off of it. You have to be dedicated, and I know most of my friends aren't. They would prefer to do Slim Fast, drop 10 pounds and then gain it right back. I want to keep this weight off. And I am. I went from 230 pounds to 160 between February and October of this year. Cool, huh?

And I'm not sickly. I have actually gotten much healthier. My blood sugar is back in check, I can run for an hour on the elliptical machine and I no longer have to feel ashamed when I clothes shop. I'm not saying being big is bad. I just wasn't happy. It's all about how you view yourself. Used to look like a supermodel but got really fat after I had my son. He was over a year old when I realized I was only going up higher and higher. So now I'm back to pre-baby weight. And I couldn't be happier.

If you need to know anything else about HCG diets, Google it or look up a local clinic. In Oklahoma City, I recommend Brooke Clinic. I tried another clinic, but they never returned any of my calls. Brooks knows me the minute I walk through the door. That's a welcoming feeling, always being greeted with a smile.

Tomorrow, I'm changing topics and comparing The Vampire Dairies television show and books. I will also review the first 2 volumes of the books, which includes: The Awakening, The Struggle, The Fury, and Dark Reunion. You should enjoy that. It'll be funny.

Common Sense Can't Be Taught

So, I don't know how else to say it but "common sense can't be taught". 

I say this because I closed custom orders for Halloween waaaaaaay back at the end of September. I got SLAMMED with made-to-order scarves, fingerless gloves, more scarves. I've been knitting my fingers raw. I posted in big letters on my Etsy store front: "Halloween orders are closed!" But guess what's been happening....

You guessed it! People trying to order for Halloween. I've had 2 people place their orders before even contacting me, so I had to refund their money. And they seemed all offended that I couldn't produce a knitted scarf for them. I fill orders as they are placed. Sorry you think you should take precedence over those that were smart enough to order in advance. And today I got the most irritating email. I am finally on my last custom order before I head out on the 2011 Music Boat Cruise. I am half-way done with a Gru scarf, and I'm knitting it like mad. The guy that ordered it just emailed me and wanted to know the status of his order. And I quote "I was trying to have it by Halloween."

Now maybe this is my fault. Maybe I should have blasted the message "No Halloween Orders!!!!" on bigger letters on my store front. But I have it figured out. NOBODY IS READING MY STORE FRONT! They're buying something and then getting mad that they missed the large "fine" print. My scarves all say "Made To Order" on them, too, and I even got chewed over someone not understanding it wasn't ready to ship the instant she bought it. I don't know what else to do. I will be glad when this month is over, needless to say.

As for the dude that waits until I'm half-way done with scarf, I'm not issuing a refund. Not a chance. I have been working hard to get this thing done, and he should have asked me if that deadline was even plausible. I know I'm ranting but I'm frustrated. I, as a store owner, should not have to contact every single buyer and ask if they needed it by a specific time. As a buyer, knowing Halloween is right around the corner, it is your job to check these things. Especially when you are the one that waited to the last minute to do something like this. 


I am exhausted. Bryan said I can sleep in late Saturday, and I am very grateful for that. I need it. Before I go crazy.

To quote Ron White, "You can't fix stupid." He is so right. Dude with the Gru scarf, if you happen to be reading this, don't take it personally. I so appreciate your business. But I am fried with all these people not reading what is plainly stated on my store. I am tired of issuing refunds, getting snarky remarks and thinking I'm even deeper in the weeds. 

Note to everyone: if you need an order by a specific date, TELL THE SELLER!

Knitty-Gritty & Dieting, Too?

Okay, let me start by saying: I'm not an expert. This is what I learned and what works for me.

I have, to date, lost 70 pounds, and I did it WITH a toddler, pets, husband deployed, housework and a yard to tend. What is the biggest thing I learned about losing stubborn weight? FIND A HOBBY. (And not in the fridge. Sometimes the fridge is NOT your friend.) 

I see a diet clinic in Oklahoma City, The Brooks Clinic, and I am a HCG success story. So I didn't do all this alone. I lost 40 pounds on the HCG diet, and 30 with my own hard work. And if you are really trying to lose weight, you will be hungry. There is no way around it. So you have to keep your mind busy! You can't just sit and watch television,because all those food commercials will drive you mad. That's where knitting comes in.

Knitting kept me sane. Crafting was my ground that allowed me to suffer through the growling stomach and the urge to boredom eat. Boredom eating and emotional eating are the #1 reason for getting fat. It was very true for me. So I knitted. And when my hands got sore and I ran out of ideas, I would read. I'm such a book nerd, so I wrote a list of every book I own that I have never read and started knocking them off the list. You'd be surprised how little things to keep you busy can help you get through these things.

Reading and knitting also got me through my husband's deployment. Because, trust me, I was wanting to emotional eat. Even if all you knit is the world's longest scarf, it helps.

What else helps? Salads! What sucks about salads? Salad dressing is terrible for diets. And the HCG diet is nothing but vegetables. So I had to find a way to make them edible. I love salads, but I have to have something on them. And that's when I found this:

This stuff is amazing! Walden Farms brand items (save for the peanut butter. IT was gross!) are the best way to tackle a diet. They make all kinds of dressings, dips, sauces and syrups. They even make pancake syrup! Now here's why they are so cool:

calorie free

gluten free

cholesterol free

sugar free

carb free

Need I say more? I know, I know. If they don't have any of the good stuff in them, like sugar and fat, how do they taste so good? Well, honestly, Hell if I know. They just do. And I recommend them to everyone. I order from them at least once a month.

Other things that got me through: Breyers Carb Smart ice cream, Blue Bell "No Sugar Added" ice cream, coconut flour pancakes, pecans, almond butter, and Laughing Cow cheeses. Oh! And don't forget Lipton Diet Green Tea with Citrus! 

Anyway, knitting saved my life when I was dieting. If I didn't have a way to keep myself busy, I would have gone Hannibal Ector on someone. Just being honest. :)

Tomorrow, I'll break down the HCG diet, for those who are curious. I get a lot of questions, so I'm going to answer them! It's going to be honest, clear and probably not for everyone.

No Down Time

There is no down time in this house. Everytime I get caught up, I get more orders. This year has been crazy on Etsy. Between Harry Potter and Gru scarves, I'm knitting myself into a coma. I didn't expect what I got this year. Last year wasn't nearly this busy. But then again, my shop is a lot more popular now. So I should just sit back and enjoy it. Even if I end up with arthritis.

This is a Gru scarf. I never realized just how popular Despicable Me really was. I loved it, but I never thought it would be a hugely popular costume idea to be Gru. Huh. Well, I know better for next year.